AHHHH my mouse is doing something really strange. Every now and again it just stops working for 2 seconds. Then my computer makes that noise that it makes when a mouse gets plugged in. Oh you were doing something? Why don’t you wait 2 seconds. It makes no sense.
I think the mouse is dying or something. Probably something loose on the inside. This is the strangest thing I have seen a mouse do.
And it’s driving me MAD
I acknowledge that I will be stressed. That I am stressed. That I have been stressed.
I acknowledge that other people will make me happy, stressed, sad, angry, and many other emotions some of which have no names.
I acknowledge that I have no control over the actions of others.
I acknowledge that I have a varying but usually limited control over my own emotions.
Most of all I acknowledge that I have complete control over my actions and should I choose to be a force in this world then I must make action rather than be acted upon.
I acknowledge that action requires energy.
And that my emotions may drain me.
And that I may not be able to hold the torch high at all times.
And that there will be times when no one will be there to help.
And that there will be others who will want to see me fail.
Some will act toward that effect.
I have two options.
I can choose to act.
Or not.
There will be times for both of these.
But If I never act then I am not a force.
I acknowledge that I will be stressed. That I am stressed. That I have been stressed.
I acknowledge that others will want from me that which I myself do not.
I acknowledge your subjectivity and I will consider it in my actions.
Purpose is an idea to work towards. Purpose is chosen. I choose my purpose.
If I am to be a force I must at times ignore those who want to see me win.
If I am to be a force I must find my own motivation.
If I am to be a force I must choose for myself which way I want to move the world.
And I must act. For good or ill, these are things to define, but I must act.
Finally, I acknowledge that my actions will be an obstacle to at least one person.
Sonder [2:39] from John Koenig’s The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows
sonder - n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own…
When I’m not writing dictionaries, I’m a graphic designer and video maker, so I decided to expand one of my definitions into a video. Enjoy.
Sonder and kenopsia are my two favourites.
still wondering is this circular gallifreyan or just my math homework
This could come in handy.
Also both
OH no. It’s almost 2:00 in the morning!
I will not draw now.
Why couldn’t I have had this urge earlier AHHHHHHH.
It’s something from a dream I had.
A green reptile but with some kind of blade for a head, ornate with a glowing red gem in the middle. A very muscular and large body. I met it on an alien spaceship. It nearly killed me.
Luckily I woke up. Take that alien lizard.
That was a strange dream.
Anyways…
I’m almost done another request. It’s taken a long time because of job hunting and discovering that motivation is harder to acquire when you’re home all day.
It’s just I’ve never had so much sleep. It makes me happy. AND FOOD. Home food!
I should not be aloud to work from home in the future.
The request I’m working on just needs the lines and dots. Some of those lines are tricky. The letters are at odd angles and there are some high density spots. It’s gonna take all my cleverness to make it work! Or I could stare at it for half a day and see the final product appear in the blankness like an echo from a perfect future. That works too but I can’t do both. And I’m not sure if I can do the stare thing in my current content state.
Time for bed.
Yesterday I heard the wind.
It felt like I hadn’t heard it in years.
It rained today.
I forgot to enjoy it.
There’s nothing here that moves me.
It’s boring.
Maybe I should start thinking of names for my art blog to be.
